


things done for love

by fiveyaaas



Series: under mistletoe [17]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Dogs, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Married Life, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, and i am SO excited for it, but they deserve a dog, i feel like i should probably come clean that i am going to make a raising hell sequel, we’re never gonna get pennycrumb in the show, where they adopt a hellhound
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2020-12-29
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:13:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28403823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fiveyaaas/pseuds/fiveyaaas
Summary: ““Vanya, do you know what happens when people adopt animals?”She turned her pleading eyes on him, but he was able to resist, having had practice by not taking in the stray who had grown fond of him after every time he fed him in the past month. (Not that Vanya knew this, considering the fact that he brought the little guy food at very late hours where she could not possibly witness him doing so. To Vanya, the dog had just grown fond of him because of his sunny personality. Or, well, maybe she just assumed that the dog liked her and not him.)”
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy/Vanya Hargreeves
Series: under mistletoe [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2036878
Comments: 2
Kudos: 32
Collections: Harcest Ficmas 2020





	things done for love

**Author's Note:**

  * For [TooYoungToFeelThisTired](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TooYoungToFeelThisTired/gifts).



> Alright, so I have all of my fiveya ficmas DONE and ready to post! I also will post the first chapter of a vanyallison fic, another horrance, and a benfiveya fic tonight!!!

Five glanced over to the dog whimpering lightly on the other side of the street, glaring at him accusingly. 

“We’re not doing it,” he told Vanya.

“But he’s so  _ sad,  _ Five. Listen to him.”

“Vanya, do you know what happens when people adopt animals?”

She turned her pleading eyes on him, but he was able to resist, having had practice by not taking in the stray who had grown fond of him after every time he fed him in the past month. (Not that Vanya knew this, considering the fact that he brought the little guy food at very late hours where she could not possibly witness him doing so. To Vanya, the dog had just grown fond of him because of his sunny personality. Or, well, maybe she just assumed that the dog liked  _ her  _ and not  _ him.)  _ “Let me tell you what will happen-”

“Your heart will grow three sizes and you’ll find the true meaning of Christmas?” When he didn’t respond, frowning at her for interrupting him, she added, “Because you’re a Grinch.”

“Yeah, I caught that.” He sent her another disapproving look before continuing, “Hypothetically, let’s say we adopted that little guy over there, which for the purposes of this  _ hypothetical _ scenario, we would call Mr. Pennycrumb.  _ Immediately after  _ we adopted Mr. P., our family would show up to our house and demand that they meet him. You see, Vanya, when people adopt puppies, everyone around them wants to interact with said puppies. Meaning that  _ we  _ would have to interact with said people.”

“But he’s so  _ little,”  _ Vanya cooed, blowing a kiss to the dog. “He just wants us to be his parents forever.”

“Vanya, think of what happens when we adopt him. Luther would try to put him in clothes and take pictures, Seven! We are  _ not  _ those people, and I love you too much to ever be that person.”

“But imagine him in a little scarf,” Vanya said, mouth drawing into a small pout. “And little socks. And a little sweater.”

“You’ve said the word ‘little’ too many times for me to possibly think you are thinking clearly on this.”

She glared at him. “If you don’t let me take him inside of our home, when there is an ice storm about to come, I will  _ not  _ allow  _ you _ inside of our home.”

“What if he has diseases?” Five complained. Mr. Pennycrumb absolutely did  _ not  _ have any diseases, at least not according to the eight vets that he’d taken him to. (Going to just one vet didn’t allow for second opinions and thus didn’t allow for the best care possible.) “What if he doesn’t understand obedience?” This was also not true, considering the fact that Five had trained him quite well. 

“Five,  _ please.”  _

“Where would we even put him?”

“Well, in our bed, when we’re sleeping. He’ll keep us warm!”

Five had been prepared for that answer. It was actually the reason he was waiting to adopt Mr. Pennycrumb. He had been puppy-proofing their home for the past month, but one of the (very important) measures he had to take had been to get a comforter that was also protected from dogs. If he were to simply Mr. Pennycrumb into their bed, he would rip everything to shreds, and Five would have a meltdown. Which was why certain precautions  _ had  _ to be made. 

Plus, his wife was trying to choose  _ a dog  _ over  _ him.  _ That would simply not do at all. 

“Vanya, it is a no.”

“I’m going to call Luther and inform him that you’ll be sleeping in the mansion indefinitely.”

Five sighed, loudly,  _ “Fine.  _ You win, but for the next week he will sleep in a crate.”

“Where are we going to find an open pet shop at this time of night?”

“I already have a crate.”

She whirled around, eyes filling with understanding. “You  _ were  _ planning on adopting him.”

“No, I wasn’t.”

“You  _ were.” _

“Stop that, people will hear you.”

“You’re a big softie,” she accused, giggling. “Just a complete teddy bear. I should inform everybody we know and then everybody we don’t know that you actually  _ do  _ have a heart.”

“Shut up, don’t say that. It’s not true.” 

When she beamed up at him and kissed his cheek, he grumbled something half-heartedly, trying to look the part of a grouchy old man for the benefit of their neighbors before sighing loudly and kissing her back, on the lips. “Nobody can know,” he grunted, pushing back an errant strand of hair that had gotten in her eyes. “That we have adopted him.”

“Does his name  _ have  _ to be Mr. Pennycrumb?” 

“Yes, that is his name. I have ensured that it is the only name he will respond to as well.”

“Why would you do that without consulting me first?”

“Because you would have named him something  _ ridiculous,  _ like ‘Fluffy.’” Vanya made a discontented noise, and he knew that he was right, offering a displeased frown to his wife. “That is a  _ horrible  _ name for a dog.”

“No, but it would be cute because it would be short for ‘Fluffernutter!’ Are you seriously trying to tell me that that is  _ not  _ an adorable name for our dog?”

Five wasn’t going to let her win this too easily, offended on the dog’s behalf that she would try to name him something so  _ uninspired,  _ but he couldn’t help but acquiesce that his wife’s reasoning was, at the very least, a  _ little  _ charming. “It is not an  _ awful _ name for a dog, but, regardless, this one responds to Mr. Pennycrumb.”

“He’ll need a friend, eventually.”

Five gaped at her, “You are not  _ seriously  _ suggesting we get a second dog.”

“About that, I already have told the Humane Society that we’re fostering to adopt a mother pup and her babies. Anyways, thanks for puppy-proofing the house!”

He wasn’t even able to protest, with how stunned he was. Five decided to just accept it, though he supposed they should probably get a place with a larger backyard.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all so much for reading!!! I appreciate everybody who has been keeping up with ficmas, and know that JjdoggieS are still fine accepting prompts for it until like... next Christmas tbh. I won’t be as good about checking the collection super late into the year, but both of us will still be on AO3 at that point for sure because we have a collab series together LMAO.


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